The neighbor whistles, and a reader wonders how to make him stop.<\/b>
\nQ. My fianc\u00e9e and I rent a wonderful apartment in Bedford-Stuyvesant, Brooklyn. A man sits on the stoop across the street and whistles as long as the sun shines. He whistles a repeating pattern, like someone breathing in and out of a harmonica. When we politely ask him to stop, he does, but only until we are out of view. It feels unfair that we cannot enjoy having the windows open in our home. Is there another approach?
A. You know what drives me crazy? The sound of a person chewing gum. If the gum chewer is unfortunate enough to be my ever-patient husband, I tell him to stop. Otherwise, I leave the room, or stew.
In other words, many of us find some noises irksome, even if they are not universally abhorred. But a noise that bothers you is not necessarily one that violates the city\u2019s noise code. A car alarm blaring endlessly at 3 a.m. \u2014 that is a nuisance, and you could call 311 or 911. A man whistling on his stoop on a sunny afternoon? Not so much.
\u201cGiven the range of possible noises that one could hear in New York City \u2014 from jackhammers to crying babies, this is something we should smile about,\u201d said Thomas P. Farley, the author of \u201cModern Manners: The Thinking Person\u2019s Guide to Social Graces.\u201d
So far, both you and the whistler have handled the situation maturely. You asked him to stop his tune, and he did \u2014 for as long as he could. But he may not even realize that he\u2019s whistling.
So what should you do? Embrace the neighborhood where you live, with neighbors who enjoy sitting on their stoops socializing and, in this case, humming a tune. No one else has sounded the alarm, why should you?
\u201cLet the man do his whistling,\u201d Mr. Farley said. \u201cIt\u2019s clearly not meanspirited.\u201d
Next time you open your windows, turn on the radio, too. A pleasant melody might drown out the sounds from the street. You may find that if you accept the sound as a permanent neighborhood fixture, it may become less grating (although I can\u2019t say the same thing about chewing gum).<\/p>\n

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Sentiment rank: 2.4<\/div>\n

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