Jeff Bezos is a terrible human being. But does that mean he can’t take a dick pic?
Last night, news broke that somehow managed to make this hell year worse. Amazon CEO and cartoon villain Jeff Bezos published a blog post on Medium accusing the tabloid paper, the National Enquirer, of “extortion and blackmail” for – oh, yes – threatening to publish a series of pictures featuring his penis.
He wrote that the Enquirer had acquired a series of dick pics sent by Bezos to a female acquaintance, and that the paper was allegedly implying the Amazon CEO should make a financial offering to hold their publication.
To take this story from “I fucking hate this timeline we’re in” to “okay, this is getting a bit too on the nose”, Bezos addressed the blog post to the chief executive of The National Enquirer ’s publisher, American Media Inc., whose name is David Pecker: “No thank you, Mr Pecker”.
I’ve written a post about developments with the National Enquirer and its parent company, AMI. You can find it here: https://t.co/G1ykJAPPwy
— Jeff Bezos (@JeffBezos) February 7,2019
There’s a lot to unpack from Bezos’ statement, from accusations of Trump’s involvement (Pecker is a confidant of the president’s) to the random reference to these pictures being sent to reporter, actress, and model Lauren Sánchez.
