They all think they’ re in on the con, and that you’ re the mark.
They all think they’ re in on the con, and that you’ re the mark.
Take MSNBC host Joe Scarborough’s lament Friday about President Donald Trump: “The guy that’s in the White House now is not the guy we knew two years ago.”
That was a response, as you probably remember, to Trump’s Twitter fusillade the morning before:
8: 52 a.m.: “I heard poorly rated @Morning_Joe speaks badly of me (don’ t watch anymore) . Then how come low I. Q. Crazy Mika, along with Psycho Joe, came. .”
8: 58 a.m.: “. . .to Mar-a-Lago 3 nights in a row around New Year’s Eve, and insisted on joining me. She was bleeding badly from a face-lift. I said no!”
Scarborough and his co-host and fiancé, Mika Brzenzski, are just two of the television talkers getting cast as side characters in the reality show produced and headlined by their old friend The Donald — whose personal feuds with members of the press are about as sincere as Vince McMahon’s with his WWE wrestlers. (And even that kayfabe seems less amusing now that Linda McMahon is a member of Trump’s cabinet.)
Last September, Scarborough, who also fancies himself a musician, played GQ’s Jason Zengerle a demo from his in-progress “Trump: The Musical, ” which he described as “ ‘Hamilton’ meets ‘The Book of Mormon’ ”:
“Blessed with this orange tan / I’ m simply titanic / Beloved by Hispanics and Jews / I’ m huge / Losers don’ t understand / The genius of my border plan / They call me a fool / Then they dare ridicule my huge hands.”
And if Trump wins? “That’s even better, ” said Scarborough. For Morning Joe’s ratings, sure.
But the Broadway wannabe’s complaint that Trump’s changed now is, of course, ridiculous. What’s different is that the Hollywood celebrity roaster has the nuclear launch codes. As he defines deviancy — and the presidency — down, I shudder to think of the 7 a.m. tweets following the 3 a.m. phone call.
(Soundtrack side note: Any show about Trump actually worth its salt would find a way to use Ike and Tina Turner’s cover of Alice Cooper’s brutal domestic-abuse anthem “Only Women Bleed.”)
To help jog Joe’s memory, here are a few excerpts (sic’ d throughout) of what Donald was dishing out on Twitter two years ago, as the MSNBC morning hosts were cheering the rise of their ratings-boosting buddy and tossing him softball questions:
June 1: “dummy Jon Stewart” is “the most overrated joke on television. A wiseguy with no talent. Not smart, but convinces dopes he is! Fading out fast… All the haters & losers must admit that, unlike others, I never attacked dopey Jon Stewart for his phony last name. Would never do that!”
He followed that tweet about a Jew’s stage name with one linking to a story “Via @ChristianToday: “Donald Trump vows to be the ‘greatest representative of Christians’ if he wins White House”
June 5: .@krauthammer pretends to be a smart guy, but if you look at his record, he isn’ t. A dummy who is on too many Fox shows. An overrated clown!
June 16: “I am officially running for President of the United States. #MakeAmericaGreatAgain”
June 17: (After seeing the Daily News cover, CLOWN RUNS FOR PREZ) : “Only a fool would buy the @NYDailyNews. Loses fortune & has zero gravitas. Let it die!”
June 18: “Watch my appearance on @Morning_Joe – great interview!”
June 21: “@sallyvp: @realDonaldTrump Mr. Trump tell America they are fired! Bring some respect and balls back to the USA.”
June 24: “.@Neilyoung A few months ago Neil Young came to my office looking for $$ on an audio deal & called me last week to go to his concert. Wow!. . total hypocrite.”
“Uncomfortable looking NBC reporter Willie Geist calls me to ask for favors and then mockingly smiles when he is told of my high poll numbers”
June 25: “I hear that dopey political pundit, Lawrence O’ Donnell, one of the dumber people on television, is about to lose his show-no ratings? Too bad”
June 27: “When somebody challenges you unfairly, fight back – be brutal, be tough – don’ t take it. It is always important to WIN!. .. When you are in a war, or even a battle, losing is not an option!”
“.@NYDailyNews, the dying tabloid owned by dopey clown Mort Zuckerman, puts me on the cover daily because I sell. My honor, but it is dead!”
July 3: “.@TheJuanWilliams you never speak well of me & yet when I saw you at Fox you ran over like a child and wanted a picture. Please share pic!”
July 4 “HAPPY 4TH OF JULY TO EVERYONE! MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!”
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